How to get a super boyfriend

Or 10 obligatory things that we should look for in a man

Every young lady, turning a certain age, is starting to look for the super boyfriend of her wildest dreams. I do not know a self respecting young woman that is not seeking for something approved by her and also by the whole world as well. Because it is better if her girlfriends are left stunned from astonishment after meeting her boyfriend than the super obvious fact that you can not find such an “animal” in the zoo. Of course everybody has his or her own taste, however a hairy, toothless, fat, drinking hard and crying a lot over the loss of the favorite team is a little bit too much. Well, ok, we exaggerated a little bit. But it is often true also that sometimes we fall for the wrong guys. Pur attraction towards a certain category “bad boys” or “boys, spoiled by their mothers”, or rich old dudes with BMWs, will bring us a momentous satisfaction, but also a minimal chance for a quality relationship with a nice and pink future.

Here we can suggest you some main things you should be looking for and find in one man, in order to be convinced that your relationship has a good perspective and last and flourish.

№1

From the very beginning you should feel that this man wants you

this can be expressed by a look, a touch, a compliment, a curiosity or attention to details. And all this should stay personal, not via sms-s or over the phone. Of course, he needs to have a desire to develop the relationship and to progress and take it to the next level. If he is not motivated enough to speak about your future opportunities and to make plans, it is absolutely clear that he is not that interested. He does not want to invest his feelings in this relationship. An important and confusing moment! The never ending calls, mails and sms-s are not a real contact! He does not touch you, see you, adore you or explore you outside the frames of the short words, received over the phone. Imagine that while he explains to you how much you mean to him, in the same time he is tucking his teeth with the other hand or is spitting on the floor or even worse – touching the hip of another woman.

№2

Soon after you`ve met him, you need to find out that he has achieved something at least in one field of his own life

For example, now he needs to have a nice job. Or at least one that is his in competence and to have an idea what he is doing. If he has inherited a business from his family, already he has to have learned how to manage the company. If he trains basketball, you need to probably see that he has managed to fit into the team unproblematically. As a whole, it has to be clearly seen that his efforts are directed towards new opportunities, skills and adventures.

And he definitely won`t say: “I am not sure where our relationship is going to”, after he keeps on calling you and regularly has sex with you. He would not send messages that are confusing and hard to understand. The quality man says what he thinks and thinks what he says. His words are supported by actions. He does not give you guarantees for a success and moves the relationship forward with the clear intention to deepen your relations. If you are currently with such a man, you won`t come to a situation when you are half drunk on the phone at 2 at night, obsessed by the thought that he is with another woman. Or despite him assuring you that he wants to get married to you, in the end to turn out that it is only you who are paying the bills around the preparation for the wedding.

When you are offering an emotional support, does he appreciate this nice think? In hard for him moments in which you have been by his side, has he returned the favor afterwards by preparing small surprises for you too? He probably remembers which is your favorite drink? Do you think and feel that you receive as much as you give? If you are ill in Saturday night, will he come over and find out some nice and funny thing to do and will stay upon his will with you for the whole evening? If you car breaks, will he come to help you? Generally speaking, if you have some kind of problem, what will he do? The answer of these simple questions, immediately gives you a velar picture of your relations. The healthy relationship is help by one very old market principle – you need to get as much as you give. It is not a matter of endless counting: “I did this. So now you do that.” The desire to return the favor to somebody needs to come naturally to you. So if all you get are just nice sms-s, short-run plans and assuring that you won`t be alone on Saturday evening, obviously you are not getting what you need and deserve.

How strange it is then when you think that you know somebody well. And all of a sudden this person changes dramatically in certain situation. You sit, you watch him and right in this moment you set him a diagnosis – division of the Self. No matter where he spends his time, with whom and how, you need to know the person with whom couple of hours ago you have been laying in bed. When his company meets him with a cry, he to respond with a cry himself, but to be real and not to wear a mask. Of course he won`t call his friends “baby”, “honey” or “sunny”, but he will be himself again there too. And to turn into a sure and experienced player. Or in a comedian. He will set himself to ease, there`s no doubt about it, but he will not try to play it cool in order to start looking more interesting to you, he would not share intimate secrets with his boys, in order to look great in their eyes. When he meets your friends, he acts normal, friendly and with the understanding that you will pay attention to themselves as well. So he won`t be acting as that you are already a reserved territory, a won battle.

You have a bad day, you lose your nerves and you say something that you yourself know is not fair to tell. But his attitude stays the same! Good for him! You need to be very cautious towards men who change their attitude abruptly, only from one word or action that he disapproves. For example you put on 2 kilograms and he refuses to have sex with you. Or when you browse around in home, dressed in an old shirt and he refuses to hold your hand because you do not look perfect. Only on the movies women look perfect right after they get up from bed. You will live very hard with a person who likes you only when you are dressed in tight jeans, sexy tops, ideal hair style and perfect skin 24 hours a day.. 7 days a week. Along with this you feel that you need to suppress yourself, to change your outlook for life in order to meet his expectations. Even if it is a matter of sex, you need to also feel free and at ease to say No when you don`t like something or to want something else and not worry if for your preferences first.

But the idea to like us the way we are does not have to make us blinded. A lot of women are using this as an excuse not to pay attention to them with the explanation that this is just how they are. Then we can blame only ourselves if at one moment we are stuck in a similar situation alone.

Even while you are quarreling he will be able to see not only your bad, but also your good features as well. For example he won`t be mad at you, after the quarrel is over. And he will move on, irrespective of the bad feelings and the suspicions. He loves you and sees a good person in you, regardless of anything else. So he won`t refuse to call or to be nice or to just close the door on you, without afterwards to go back only because you have decided to share your important outlook with him.

If you share with him that you need more time together or to stop do something because you do not like it, he will look at his attitude and want to change it as well. He will learn from his mistakes and he will change what he realizes is harmful to your relations. In this case we should not act like a real bitch and to try to tell him what to do. He has lived so long according to some rules and understandings and there is no way to change the irritating habits that he has. The dirty socks that gather dust on the sofa, a warning message is coming for the forbidden to pay bill for the electricity. These are easy simple things. However, there are some things which in case he does not give up, and then it means that you are just not that important to him. For example, his ex girlfriend is calling every day; she asks him for various favors and flirts with him in your presence. In the name of friendship he is picking up the phone, smiles to the flirt and does everything that his ex one wishes. After you ask him to stop doing so, if he really loves you, he`ll stop doing so.

You have found a real precious man, in case he does not hide or deny his problems and is determined to do anything within his power to solve them. He`ll ask for s friend or a professional help, he`ll talk, he`ll look for advice and resources. He won`t be showing extra pride or denial. This does not mean to cover them with self help books, but if he does not manage to understand, then he will hardly be able to maintain a healthy, balanced relationship.

He won`t leave you wondering where is he and what he is doing. Or leave you wander and wait only in order to prove that he is right. When you are around him you always feel like second hand, like you are not amongst his first priorities, that`s why you usually need to escape for several days in order to revive the energy that you have had before. Even if he has more money, relations, prestige or power than you do, he does not have to make you feel like Nothing without him. He needs to have a desire to listen to you, to include you in the discussion of the important decisions. You may not be competent enough on all the questions, but his desire to share or hear your opinion is enough by itself. This balance and equality guarantees him your love even when he is not in that good shape. So he won`t be so concentrated on the desire the Last word to say to be his own.